1.
Whooa! What luck! All bad, that is! You see, I am a pro skier. I thought I would take the weekend off and go up to the Swiss Alps for some training. You can __ how it turned out. Let me see how I can get out of here. Some pro skier I am, can't even jump a simple cliff only a couple feet high. It's hard to explain how it happened. I was gliding down the hillside when I saw there was a low bench in the earth. I gathered up speed and when I jumped and yelled, well, I think that was my mistake, because that yell triggered an avalanche! I looked like a big snow ball being thrown down a hill. Ahh that's better, those gliding poles come in handy whne you're stuck in an avalanche. I think I better get going now. I spent too much time in the snow. Ahh-choooo!

2.
"Nooooo ... Not again!" As I breathed harder and harder, I felt my skin grow and expand. My hair almost leaped out of my head, and when I looked into the mirror I saw the most horrible thing. My teeth, my hair, my skin, it was all too much.

"Help! Noooo!"

I smashed all my equipment, throwing glasses here and there. But I knew I couldn't let anyone find out this horrible ... me!

"Kill, kill, kill, kill. I must kill someone. Kill, kill, kill."

The thought raced through my mind, and I couldn't get it out. My hand broke through the window.

"I must find a victim. I need blood."

As I ran into the woods, a hunter shot. Me, that is. I felt the blood pour out of me and into the ground.

"Now no one will ever find out the truth. No one, no one......"

Then I was dead.

What Luck!
by Jimmy Pascoe
circa 1979

The earliest story (actually two shorts) that I have evidence of writing. All thanks to my mom, who saved this ever-yellowing piece of paper instead of sending me to a mental hospital, which is clearly what she should have done.

And props to my elementary teacher, who game me a "V+" for both of these assignments instead of calling the police.