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Thursday, December 22, 2005The Reason
Christmas lights. I don't hate 'em. Some are really inspiring, but a lot end up in cheese land real fast. Don't even get me started about icicle lights.
Now tonight, I drive by this house on the way home and it's got lights on the roof -- not along the edge of the roof, ON THE ROOF -- that spell out in script letters: Jesus the Reason Was it just too damn much trouble to put in that "IS"? Did they run out of space? A little bit of advance planning and you would know better than to be stuck with a "Jesus is the Reas" on your tiny roof. But still... I'd like to believe that these folks dream at night that God is up there surveying the neighborhood. And he's all, "Jesus! Boy, get over here. Check it out." God throws his arm around his son and points down to my neighborhood. "See that? 'Jesus the Reason' baby! Hive five! Get the Holy Ghost over here to check this shit out!" Of course it's rather presumptious of me to think this is a religious message. Jesus the Reason -- could be a Mexican wrestler. "Ladies and Gentlemen! In this corner, from Mexico City! Jesus! The Reason! The Reason!" The crowd goes wild. Damn. I want that to me MY wrestling name. Well, I'm not much of a wrestler. Maybe my mob name. "Hey, Bugsy. I gots the bad news. The Tony the Chin was talking to Jim the Reason, and the boys ain't happy. Yeah, it's the Christmas lights again. I know, I know. But you don' wanna gets on the bad side of the Reason." No. You don't. // posted at
10:20 PM //
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4 Comments:
I can't help but think about how this entry might have been different if the rooftop had read "Jesus is Reason" rather than "Jesus the Reason".
Maybe they DID run out, and it was supposed to read "Jesus the Reasonable."
As in, "I'm a reasonable man. You can't bring the frankincense and myrrh, no problem. Just be damn sure you bring the gold."
There's one on our block that says "Messy Christmas." I think it's supposed to say, you know. "Merry" Christmas, but the cursive letters are illegible.
--TS in PC, Fla.
Sometimes Christmas messages get a little garbled. For instance, five words:
We still believe in Satan.
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